the case of the mysterious period

So, if you recall shortly before I went on vacation my period started – it lasted for a day then stopped only to reappear a week later and last for a full week.  So, now almost EXACTLY a month later my period has started again.  A month is normal for a lot of people, it has NEVER been normal for me.  I don’t know what to think – I’ve been super bad about taking my metformin so I know it’s not medicine magically giving me a regular cycle – so I’m not sure what could be causing it.  I’m anxious to see if it stays for all of a day only to disappear again and reappear a week from now.  I’m also worried that it could be a sign, a sign that another year long bleed-a-thon could be on the horizon – which I REALLY don’t want. 😦
In all honesty, I’m not sure what to do.  Is having a quasi-normal period something I should be happy about or concerned about?  We are in a complete holding pattern regarding our infertility and aside from contacting our RE a few weeks ago to get a refill on the Metformin, which I haven’t used since (yes-I know I suck), we haven’t had any appointments or anything with them since our last failed IUI.  Should I contact them, should I contact my regular OBGYN, should I just let it happen?  I’m also wondering if this is a sign I should start charting again and peeing on magic ovulation sticks?  Anyone, have any ideas/advice?

there is a marching band in my uterus

Mother Nature thou art a heartless bitch.  Since my last IUI I have had all of one menstrual cycle, today #2 decided to show up.  I go on vacation in a little over a week.  For about the last decade when my cycle does decide to show up it is either 1.) medically/chemically induced, 2.) Lasts for over a year for some unknown reason or 3.) makes me feel like I”m going to die.   Currently it’s #3.  I don’t just get cramps, I get magical cramps that make me vomit.

Awesome.

Seriously, this better be done with by next week.  I’m road tripping my happy butt clear across the country with my husband for two weeks.  Part of our trip is at a romantic bed & breakfast, pretty sure if this is still going on there isn’t going to be much romance happening.  I am not a happy camper.

There is a part of me that wants to try and look at it in a positive way and think “Huzzah, Metformin you are doing your job!!” – but seriously, the timing is pretty sucky so realistic me slaps down positive me every time I try to tell myself that.   Even my husband who is usually Mr. Sunshine & Rainbows couldn’t even manage to put a good spin on this.

A picture of my uterus currently

Insert witty title about feeling like crap here

Feeling like major crapola today – had heavy duty dental work done yesterday and my period started as well.  Major lesson about dental work – don’t go 5+ years without going to a dentist as it will cost you big time (in money and in pain) when you do finally go.  Although it’s not like I didn’t go because I didn’t want to go, I simply wasn’t able to afford to go – as there was a time before the husband where I lived paycheck to paycheck and then some so it would come down to “pay rent vs. go to the doctor/dentist” and at that time rent would always win out.  Soooooo thankful I have finally reached a point in my life where living comfortably is an actual possibility, granted all the RE bills are still the gigantic financial rain cloud hanging over our heads, but at least we can do something vs. nothing.

Also, on the “woe is me” front my period started yesterday with a bang, I haven’t had a period since my last failed IUI cycle months ago so this one is sucking big-time.  The pain is something completely different and something I haven’t had with any other period, it’s almost like a squeezing feeling instead of the normal crampy feeling and I don’t really know what to make of it.

I know that I was stupid enough to think these past few weeks that there was a chance in hell I was pregnant and now I don’t know what to think  as ever since I had my hysteroscopy I haven’t had a period that wasn’t medically induced so I don’t really know what this is.  A miscarriage?  Vindication from mother nature for daring to think that I might actually get lucky and get pregnant naturally? Or just my body trying to flush out whatever?  I have no idea, all I know is that it seriously hurts in more ways than one and as of now I just want to curl up in bed and sleep.

I’m supposed to go to Temple tonight as this weekend is Shavuot, I’ve been going regularly for the last couple weeks (I just started my conversion process) and I feel like a failure if I don’t go tonight but I seriously don’t feel like going anywhere and would like to think G-d and my rabbi would understand.   Perhaps I will email her (my rabbi not G-d :P) and try to explain, hopefully that will be good enough.